The Art of Winning Blog

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

DOMA, Texas Women, and more Semantics

I was thrilled to wake up this morning and read the news that DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) was deemed unconstitutional and that the filibuster protected health care rights in TX. However, as the morning has continued, I find myself slightly disturbed. DOMA is not a victory for gay rights. It is a victory for human rights. The filibuster wasn't in defense of women; it was in defense of health care. Yes there are marginalized groups that would have been more negatively impacted by other results. But in finding the victories, we are removing those artificial distinctions. We are saying "This is the world I want to live in. This is equality, where difference doesn't equal exclusion".

Jackson Katz has an amazingly powerful Tedx talk about the importance of semantics and the bystander effect. We are the bystanders who should claim our voice and say the DOMA defeat is a victory for couples. Now we put the emphasis on love, bonding, and responsibility, not on the gender of the individuals. Now we can focus on more important distinctions as we've recognized that gender is not a distinction that negatively effects love and marriage. We are the bystanders who should stand with the people of Texas to say thank you for supporting people's access to health care. It wasn't just about abortion (that's the headline), it was about how to regulate out-patient medical care.

I'm also going to say that it wasn't liberals who defeated DOMA, nor conservatives who supported it.  It was people and to truly move into a brighter we need to understand people, and stop attacking the labels.

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